I would never leave my house


Pan could wear his favorite costume all day and greet visitors.

Reasons why LOML is LOML:  Because he send me things like this:


I'm not sure if I'm allowed to post these pictures on here because I'm not sure how blogging politics work, but I'm a rebel so I'm gonna do it anyways.

Courtesy of Elite Home Theater Seating:

I love how they have the actual Pirates movie playing, so we won't get confused about what theme this is supposed to be. I would have been completely lost if it had been playing Inception.

There is a motherfucking fake sky there.  I seriously cannot contain myself.

I'm not really sure if this is necessary.  I mean it still looks cool, but it also kinda looks like a garage, which I'm pretty sure it once was.  But do we really need that much more effort for what is essentially a hallway into the room you actually want to hang out in?

Not gonna lie, they phoned it in for the tavern.  Decent start, but compared the the first room of what my dreams are made of, kinda not so much "piratey" as "somewhat old looking with a plant or two."

I'm obsessed with the ship's wheel.  I am unallowed to have a ship's wheel on display in the house because a certain someone has a hard time dealing with the "nautical" look and it is apparently too "on the nose" but apparently as long as we are spending $2.5 million on an actual pirate ship to go in our garage then that's just dandy and WHY WON'T YOU JUST GIVE ME  A STRAIGHT ANSWER DAMN YOU?!?  

Apologize for the swearing, seeing evidence of pure pirate genius is like crack to me.  Or it could be the adderol LOML slips into my lunch when he wants to toy with my emotions.* 

Anyways, I promise soon I will have an actual post of me getting something accomplished and not just me figuring out how I can find whoever owns this and convince them that I'm their long lost daughter.  Although if that does happen, then I'm totally quitting this blog and having them sponsor my lifelong dream of finding a unicorn.  And to my real parents, I still love you and all, but I might have to make some edits to my birth certificate, it's for the greater good, you know?

*Undocumented, but I'm pretty sure he does this.  I think he's conspiring with the gnomes to slowly break me down. Another day, my friend, another day.